This is What Makes us Girls
by lulamae-golightly
Summary: AU Where the Fashion Club girls are party girls...and Quinn gets sucked into their world.


**A/N: This is an AU where the Fashion Club are party girls. Yes, they drink, smoke, and get high. I didn't know whether to rate this T or M, so if anyone wants me to change it, let me know, and yes the title is inspired by the Lana Del Rey song. Daria belongs to MTV.**

"C'mon, Quinn, it's good for you," Sandi slurred, holding the dangerous looking object out for her.

"Sandi, that's a cigarette." Quinn replied nervously.

"No...it's weed...duh Quinn..." Tiffani said after taking a drag.

They were sitting in Sandi's back yard on a Saturday night. Quinn had thought it would've been like she expected, but she had just joined the Fashion Club, and she realized she didn't know them all that well yet. "C'mon," Stacey prodded. "I was nervous at first, too."

Quinn didn't know why they all smoked the stuff, or wanted her to, but she took Sandi's and took a drag, just to fit in.

Besides, how much harm could it do?

In about ten minutes, they were all giggling messes. "See Quinn?" Stacey said loudly, "this is fun!"

"Stacey!" Sandi exclaimed just as loudly, "Shush!" Stacey looked hurt for a moment.

"Do your parents know you do this?" Quinn asked breathlessly.

"Quinn...we're not stupid." Tiffani replied.

"Yeah, if my parents knew they would kill me!" Stacey said.

"My parent's would kill me. Or do worse." Quinn realized aloud, though she didn't know what was worse than killing your daughter.

"God, I wish we had some beer or something." Sandi sighed.

Quinn blinked. "You guys...drink, too?"

"Gee, Quinn, who do you know smokes weed and doesn't drink?" Sandi fell into a coughing fit.

So, they spent the rest of the night smoking and giggling, but all the way Quinn had a horrible, uneasy feeling in her stomach.

The next day when Quinn was back at home, she laid down on her bed, sighing, thinking of what she had done with her friends the night before. The marijuana had given her several coughing fits, causing her parents to wonder if she was getting sick. And a strange feeling had settled in her stomach, not one of sickness, but of horrible guilt.

She soon found herself drifting off with her clothes and lights still on.

She awoke the next morning, to the screaming of her alarm clock. She had a horrible taste in her mouth, and her body felt odd from having slept in her clothes. Rising out of bed, she put on fresh clothes, deciding there was no time to shower. She spent a while on her hair and makeup until joining her family downstairs.

"Feeling better today, sweetie?" Her father asked.

"Much better, daddy." She smiled sweetly at her father. Daria looked up at her suspiciously. She ate her waffles quickly, later joining her sister and father in the car.

"So, got any new friends?" Her sister asked.

"Uhm...just the Fashion Club. Sandi, Tiffani, and Stacey. But other people like me, too."

"Oh, and I guess they're just not worth your time?"

Quinn huffed. "Now, Daria," Jake began, suddenly pulling up at the school.

"Oh, look, there's Jane and her...brother, I think." Quinn pointed out. Daria's cheeks turned pink. "Go say hi!" Her sister urged her.

"Um, er, n-no thanks." Daria mumbled.

"Ooookay?" Quinn drew out, spotting her friends. "See ya!" She exclaimed, running towards them.

"Hi, Quinn!" Stacey greeted her.

"Was that fun...Saturday night...or what?" Tiffani said.

"I know!" Sandi agreed, grinning.

"Uh, yeah..." Quinn replied awkwardly.

"Maybe we could hang out...today...at my house..." Tiffani slowly suggested. "My parents are...gone and they have...alcohol..."

"Okay... Sandi replied. "Will you be joining us, Quinn?"

"Sure." Quinn answered, and she was relieved when the bell rang. "C'mon." She said, and led them to homeroom.

At Tiffani's house, they sat outside by her pool in the odd heat of September, the smell of marijuana hanging in the air. They drank wine from the bottle, and a strange buzz was slowly settling over Quinn. "This is really fun, actually..." She admitted, drunker than she'd like to have been.

Stacey, who was sprawled across the grass, sighed. "Yeah...like, you're scared at first and then...it's like it doesn't matter anymore...you want to do it...you do it to fit in...and then you do it for yourself...and nothing matters anymore..."

"Stacey...you're not making any sense..." Tiffani said. And really, she wasn't. Stacey's speech was disconnected and slow. But Quinn understood. Maybe it was the wine, but she wanted this. She wanted weed and wine and chocolate...and she wanted to swim.

She began stripping down to her underwear, jumping into Tiffani's pool as the girls screamed at her. Sandi tossed the wine aside and stripped as well, jumping in. Then Tiffani, then Stacey. All of them were swimming and screaming, laughing like lunatics.

Quinn was having fun, her drug-induced haze blurring her sense of reality. Soon all she was hearing was the screams, the splashes, and that song from The Rocky Horror Picture Show playing in her head.

And then it melted away.

"Don't dream it, be it."

The week passed. There were a few more visits to Sandi's house, but none to Tiffani's anymore. There was rain after the heat, and thunderstorms at night.

Though the moments themselves were fun, Quinn often woke up with a disoriented feeling. Most days, she dreaded school and wanted to stay inside all day.

Adults had warned her that getting into such things would be internally damaging, both emotionally and physically. But when she started drinking, she wanted to keep doing it. When she got high, she wanted to get even higher. She wanted to feel alive, instead of soulless.

As the school years continued, so did everything else. They swam in Tiffanni's pool, smoked, and drank wine from the bottle. They went to parties and drank punch-usually spiked. They played Spin the Bottle and kissed both boys and girls. They looked happy. They went on dates with boys and drank with them. Sandi lost her virginity at the beginning of senior year, but she was the only one. Quinn had gone a little farther than kissing, but nothing else.

As the years passed, Quinn forgot about everything. School wasn't important-she always got boys to do her homework. Her parents still believed her to be their happy, social butterfly-type daughter...and her sister...

One night, mid-junior year, Quinn heard a knock on her bedroom door. "It's me," her sister said.

"What do you want, Daria?"

"Just let me come in."

Quinn sighed. "Fine." Her sister came in and sat on her bed.

"Listen, Quinn..."

"You better not be wasting my time."

"I'm not. I want you to know that...well...I'm...i'mworriedaboutyou." Daria mumbled. Quinn opened her mouth to say something, but her sister gestured for her to stop. "You're my sister...and I don't want you...going in this direction."

"In what direction?"

"You know what I'm talking about. I hear about what you and the Fashion Club do...everyone talks about it."

"Yeah, we don't care."

"That's the problem. I'm gonna go off to college soon...I don't want you like this, Quinn. You are smart and good, but with the direction you're going in...that could go to waste and... I just don't want you getting hurt."

Quinn felt herself shaking, her eyes burning. "I'm not getting hurt...Daria, I'm fine! J-just leave me alone!"

Her sister suddenly looked so sad that Quinn had to look away. "Okay," Daria said. "Okay." And she got up and left.

The redhead sunk down on her bed and stared out the window until her vision blurred.

One night, mid-senior year, when Daria was off at college, Quinn drank so much she passed out. It was surprisly a first, even though she had been very close before. She woke up in a sleeping bag on someone's floor and began panicking.

"God, Quinn," a sleepy, yet familiar voice said. "Stop moving around..."

"My head hurts sooooo bad..." Quinn groaned.

"You passed out..." Tiffani breathed.

"Ugh," Quinn groaned again. "Why did you guys let me do that?"

"It's not like we could stop you. You kept saying 'no. I want it, I want it. I wanna be numb again.' What does that even mean?" Sandi scoffed.

"Wait. Where's Stacey?"

"She went home sobbing last night."

Upon that, Quinn stumbled up and dressed quickly. "What...are you doing?" Tiffani asked.

"Going to see Stacey." Quinn replied. Thank God she lived next door. Not even allowing the girls to say anything in response, she dashed out of the door.

Knocking on the Rowe's house, she was greeted by Stacey. Her hair was frizzy and puffy, and her eyes had dark circles under them.

When she saw her friend, she instantly burst into tears. "I-I'm get-getting sent away..."

"What?"

"I-I told my mom last night...I was drunk and she...and...she...she said...she's sending me to live w-with my dad 'til college...in the next town over..."

"You never told me your parents divorced..."

"When I was a kid," Stacey sputtered. "Look, you need to go home...my mom went out and if she finds out I had anyone here she would get really mad...madder, I mean."

"Okay...call me, okay?" Stacey simply nodded.

"Mom?"

"Yes, Quinn?" Helen paused. "Why do you smell like alcohol?"

And, just like her friend, Quinn began to cry. "Quinn, honey?"

"I don't know where I'm going anymore!"

"Is there something you'd like to tell me?"

So Quinn closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and told her mother the whole story. From the beginning to the morning.

After she finished, her mother looked shocked, concerned, and most of all, sad. "I understand you wanted to fit in. I just wish you didn't do what you did, and I wish you would've stopped earlier, instead of going on for years."

"Daria tried to convince me, last year..." Quinn said through her tears.

"I thought something was going on. Now, Quinn, I'm going to wait til your father comes home to discuss this any further." Helen stood up and gave her daughter a long hug.

Quinn slept there rest of that day, occasionally waking up. She heard her parents talking, but was too sleepy to make out what they were saying.

She awoke at eleven in the morning. "I'm missing school." She said to herself. She ran downstairs to find her mom sitting at the table, drinking coffee. "Mom!" She exclaimed. "You're not at work and you didn't wake me up!"

"I think you need to stay home today," Helen said. Quinn sighed, secretly a little happy to miss a day of school.

"A-am I getting sent away?" Dude asked.

"No, but I do want to keep you home for a little while." The phone then rang. Quinn grabbed it and answered.

"Quinn?"

"Stacey!" Her mother shot her a concerned look.

"Um...I'm leaving tomorrow...could you please stop by? I don't have anyone else to say goodbye to..."

"Yes. Of course."

"See you then..."

"Bye, Stacey."

That night, Quinn sat thinking about the past years.

"Tell me again, why do we do this?" She had asked once.

"Because it's fun." Sandi said.

"Because...we like it..." Tiffani added.

"B-but, it's bad for you!" Quinn exclaimed. "And it's over so fast..."

"Everything's gonna end." Sandi pointed out. "We're girls. We're expected to be all sweet and soft and all that shit. That's what makes us girls."

That was the truest thing Quinn had heard Sandi say. And in that moment, she didn't wanna be soft and sweet either. She was a sophomore then. She had finally become like them, and didn't want to lose that.

So she decided, rebellion was what made them girls.

"Quinn..." Stacey said as she loaded her bags into her mom's car. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"Standing by me no matter what. I wish I had the guts to stop before it got so bad."

"I didn't have any either."

"Well," a hint of a smile was on Stacey's face. "Tiffani and Sandi, they're still doing it. They may still be doing it college for all we know."

"Is it bad I miss it a little?"

"You miss the highs, not the actual thing."

"You're smarter than I thought." Tears were forming in her eyes, a sad smile spreading across her mouth. "I'm gonna miss you so much."

"You were my best friend. I always wanted to impress you."

Quinn laughed. "I always wanted to impress YOU. On my first day of school, you were the first one to greet me."

Tears were falling freely from Stacey's eyes. "Goodbye, Quinn." They embraced for a long time. "Don't forget me."

"Goodbye, Stacey." They pulled apart, smiled sadly, and Quinn watched as her best friend got into the car and drove away. She wondered if they'd ever see each other again.

"Goodbye, Stacey, goodbye." She murmured sadly

Then Quinn got into her own car and drove home, hoping only for a good day at school tomorrow (her first day back), and most of all, for a good future.


End file.
